Tuesday 12 September 2017

THEY CAME FROM THE DOCKS



1. COLLECTIVE NOUNS


lot
of
old guys
laid off from the docks
got
work
in
the
warehouse
in
the
north east service road
in
the
new build
orange brick mall

now whats a collective noun
for a group of old guys like that ?

id go with 
a woodbine of old guys these days

but back then 
i think
i called them 
a coach trip to margate
left on purpose
at the first piss stop



2. EALING WITHOUT SATIRE

they had enoch powells headache
maddox drumsticks in their minds

tony was 6 5
a tower of distance
with busted hips
and
walked
like
he
had

bad cam wheel down there

and colin was a little fascist 
a fist faced fucker fascist

he took control
of them all
in a little hitler
little britain
old school mussolini
shop floor union rep 
mosley kind of way

i was reminded of an ealing film
but without peter sellars
or the comedy

he called for tea breaks
on the dot
and
made all the brews
in his own sweet time

and
ran
the conversation 
about the old days




3. TAILFANNY

the old days apparently were
all
about
chuffing
away
60 a day before clock out

and them dirty nig nogs

and office tailfanny

and real graft

and obviously 
the country had gone to the dogs
and obviously
the rest of us didnt know we were born

but at least
we all agreed
that a brown weekly pay envelope
in cash
on a friday

was the dogs nuts

but that was all



4. CLIQUE

you toed the line
or youre out the clique

i was out the clique
hair too long
too keen for overtime
always wanted to work the aisles
the furthest away

so i didnt have to hear
them go on about
the war they never fought in
and
hear
them 
throwing
their
toys
out
their
jingoistic pram

and i didnt give a toss
about football at all



5. CLASH

and the retail managers then
well the old school
was in head office
with company cars

and the branch management
were young posers
sniffing round the till girls

and they didnt know how to handle 
colins relentless
moody requests
that the pay office
work out our hours again
and how about
new brooms
and
more men

it was a culture clash

and anyway
theyd all retire soon

or die

wouldnt they ?



6. GRANDPARENTS

these dinosaurs
they called all the cleaners 
sweetheart
love

shes a good bird theyd say

and flirted 
like theyd
fucked their way
round the globe
like some navvy casanova

and EVERYONE else
was
a
cunt
or
a
bastard

and all this bile 
and bitter anger
was a revelation

they had a 
working class superiority complex
based 
on 
a
steadily diminishing place in the world
and
an
empathy bypass

my grandparents werent like this

were they ?



7. TOO FRESH A FISH

and one day 
colin called me a nigger lover
and poured my brew down the sink
cos
i
had
a
friend who was a vague kind of brown
whod stopped in to say 
hey
how you doing 
with them old gits
in there ?

and i was too young
too fresh a fish
too shocked

too shut down

to break his nose
feed him his own teeth

or
report him
to management

altho id already learnt
reporting things to management
was pissing in the mire

i never talked to him again
gave him the dead eye
and did my own brews

and hes dead by now
theyre all dead by now

and we arent

so theres that



8. REDEMPTION

they werent all like that
these old guys
limping out the old world

mike had been a city bank teller
all the way up to the bank teller cull
in the automated 80s

he always sang that singing postman song
from 1964
hev yew gotta loight boy ?
hev yew gotta loight ?

later it was in an ovaltine ad
hev yew gotta loight boy ?
an ovaltine light ?

he always wore a tshirt with a collar
under his work shirt also with a collar
and
was
late to fatherhood
and loved it

he nodding off at tea breaks
shook his head to extra hours

and after he was gone 
and the ovaltine ad aired
id picture him
at home
mug of ovaltine
singing it to his son
tv on

and mike must be dead too by now

RIP mike

hope yew gotta light boy 
hope yew gotta ovaltine light 



9. REDEMPTION 2

and bob was from the merchant navy 
and then railways
when the railways were railways
and
looked
20 years younger than he was

no flab on him
tendons like bridge cable

easily the cleaners favourite

a workers worker

i find it difficult
to believe hed ever die

when he left
he left behind his BR mackintosh
for me
to use
tipping lorries
in the rain

it was a waxed monster
an apocalypse coat

it could stand up by itself

and i took it with me
when i left

its the sort of thing
to wear at halloween
if you give a shit
about halloween

i dont

i just like that it was bobs
and think if i threw it out

id be throwing him out too



10. YOUNG TURKS

and in dribs and drabs
these old guys
dropped away

and us young uns
we took over

diverse as the united nations of benetton

we organised a breakfast run
and
got an hour of warehouse cricket in
every morning
before management
came
yawning
into
the
offices

or sometimes golf
or five a side in the loading bay
before the cameras went in

radio 1
instead of
radio 2

and back then radio 1
wasnt anywhere near 
half as shit as it is now

i was in the clique then

or at least an overseas territory

we played poker for luncheon vouchers
in a break room you could smoke in

id often win
even
with
tequila
hangovers
so
intense
they were like mescaline highs 




Image result for the singing postman


from bbc.co.uk

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